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Second Marriage
By Beverly Mahone
Is marriage really better the
second time around? As one who falls into that category, I say
absolutely! I'm very excited and feel blessed to have been given another
opportunity to love again.
But in hindsight, my first marriage wasn't built on a foundation of
love. It was "lust" right from the start. Unfortunately, when the
passion started fading away, we realized there was nothing else we had
in common. Many young people tend to confuse lust for love and fall into
the trap of letting their emotions take control of their logical,
rational thinking mind.
Isn't it interesting how differently we think when we're young as
opposed to when we grow older and wiser? When I look back over my
younger days, I realize I spent way too much time craving the WRONG man
for all of the RIGHT reasons. I wanted to feel love, to be loved, and to
give love in return but the sex clouded my judgment in making sure I was
choosing the right mate. Can you relate? How many times did you ignore
someone's red flag warnings because you were head over heels in love
with the "idea" of being in love? How often did you justify or simply
overlook his or her faults and irresponsible behavior because you were
so sure they would change?
Then what happens to your happily ever after? Mine ended abruptly in
divorce court and I spent many days and nights trying to understand why
I let myself get into such a mess. But thank God for maturity and
wisdom! Once I wiped the tears away for good and took off the blinders,
I began to see what it really meant to be involved in a meaningful
relationship.
One of the beautiful things about growing older is it gives us the
benefit of wisdom. That, in turn, allows us to make smarter choices. As
for me, I'm smart enough not to believe in love at first sight anymore.
One reason being, I don't see quite as well as I used to. I'm also smart
enough to be more discriminating in my taste. I've learned how to weed
out the imitation from the real thing.
So now I'm happy to say God has blessed me with a new love. He's a man
who's strong enough to deal with my strengths, yet gentle enough to
understand and cope with my emotional stress and strife. I'm totally
enjoying my second marriage and yes, it makes lusting after him even
better!
Beverly Mahone is a veteran
journalist and author who writes about issues affecting baby boomers in
her book “Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age.” She is
available for interviews. Visit her website at
www.talk2bev.com
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